Sept, 2000
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From: Brad White
To: <wally@wallyandmurk.com>
Subject: answer: question of the week
Date: Thu, 28 Sep 2000 16:06:29 -0700
(In answer to our question of the week)
YES, I HAVE. Give me a HELL YEAH! I've barked like a dog during
sex and
I fully recommend it. You guys have the greatest show in the
world,
you fulfill that half an hour while we drink and shhmoke before
we hit a
night in the boring city of Ottawa. Anyways I think you guys
should have
an hour show and you should show more cuts like you do at the
end. That is
the best part of the show to tell you the truth. I love you guys
man...
Bobby
Steve replies,
During editing we occasionally thought
of giving up and running nothing but
out-takes for an entire episode, but not even Wally and Murk
screw up THAT
much.
Murk replies,
Speaking of dogs. Ever notice the look
on a dog's face as it takes a poop
in the park? It's the exact same face most guys make during sex.
(I know
this because I've compared videos of both.)
Wally replies,
Thank you for that brilliant insight,
Murk.
From: Michael Putnam
To: <wally@wallyandmurk.com>
Subject: The best thing since water based lubricant :)
Date: Wed, 27 Sep 2000 21:36:50 -0400
I just wanted to write and say your show -- yes Wally you with
your
witty reparte and choice dialogue -- proves that even intelligent
people
can have a sick sense of humour (vuuullllva). You are the man.
Chicks
should be all over you. Unfortunately they are probably intimidated
by
your intellect... women are so intelligent they like to control
us. They
feel intimidated by someone on their own level. I make your show
a
must-watch or must-tape affair. I saw the show recently where
you had x-ray
pictures of things in peoples' rectum's. Well be damned if the
next day (I
am an RN in a rural ER) some guy doesn't come in with a HUGE
dong stuck up
there. Needless to say I couldn't resist laughing because I was
thinking
about your show. Keep up the good work..... Michael Putnam
Wally replies,
If a woman has any sense at all she'd
prefer the company of intelligent men
because we're much more likely to remember where we left the
keys to the
handcuffs.
Murk replies to Wally,
You don't LEAVE them anywhere. Anybody
with any kind of bondage experience
knows you keep them looped on your nipple ring, you knob.
Steve replies,
Sorry about that. It's been a couple
of weeks since they got any mail, and
the boys are a little tense.
Date: Thu, 07 Sep 2000 11:50:46 -0400
From: Lisa Hunt
To: wally@wallyandmurk.com
Subject: Could you be clones?
Hi Wally
My husband and I were watching our favourite morning show
and he
commented on just how much the hosts reminded us of you two.....
We were
wondering, could it be possible........ that someone had cloned
you both
for CNBC Squawk Box? I mean Joe Kernen is just wicked on the
keyboard
just like Murk with the fuzzy hair and all. I have always suspected
that
his buddy is wearing a 'rug' - he could be bald underneath all
that fake
hair. But what really clinched it was the way they fly around
the
screens with all that information. Nobody else but you and Murk
have
that kind of keyboarding talent.....
Perhaps you could be guest hosts on Squawk Box some morning
and really
show them how it is done.... or maybe they could be guests on
your show?
Or maybe you guys could start up your own rival financial internet
investment show. You know, all the best porn sites (most pics
for the
dollar, best priced toys, where to invest money made from illegal
sex
acts, etc). It certainly would be flagged (or flogged, for some
people)
on our schedule (like Friday's at 11:30!!!).
Two adoring fans
Lisa and Tim
P.S. Wally, just who is your 'daddy'?
Wally replies,
It's not a question of who is MY daddy.
I am the Daddy. Koo Koo Ka Choo.
From: Luigi Rigalo
To: wally@wallyandmurk.com
Subject: Link
Date: Tue, 12 Sep 2000 18:25:47 EDT
Your show rocks. It is the best. Where the hell do you come
up with your
ideas?
Thanks man for the laughs,
Luigi
Steve replies,
We get a lot of our ideas by going to
search engines and typing in the
studiest combination of words we can think of. For example, when
we tried
"nipples" and "butterscotch" we were rewarded
with the Messy Fun Sploshing
site, which in turn inspired the fetish episode. In fact, we're
still
trying to find a combination of words that a search engine can't
somehow
connect to a sex site. We thought "bananas" and "sputum"
might do the
trick... but you'd be surprised.
Date: Thu, 07 Sep 2000 02:51:35 -0700
From: Bill K.
To: wally@wallyandmurk.com
Subject: Hey Wally.
Hey Wally,
Do you ever watch The Sex Files on The Discovery Channel?
On last
week's episode (the "Erection" ep.), they showed a
rubber penis doll
with a big smiling face on the front and a rubber ring strapped
around
its midsection to keep the blood from escaping to demonstrate
a device
used to treat impotence. The narrator of the program called him
"Mr.
Happy."
Any relation to him? Why can't you be happy and cheerful like
him,
instead of looking so grumpy and miserable all the time?
Wally replies,
In my opinion, the rubber ring around
the midsection wasn't there to
prevent blood from escaping - it was an electroshock device designed
to
regularly blast 70 thousand volts of joy through your feckless
Mr. Happy. I
too could be a blithering Pollyanna with the aid of a gizmo like
that, but
I prefer to be one of the few lucid folks left on this miserable
planet.
Ps - And, no, we're not related. Do
you ask every black person you meet if
they're related to Denzel Washington?
From: Joy co66
To: murk@wallyandmurk.com
Subject: terrific
Date: Fri, 08 Sep 2000 14:51:58 GMT
Wally, Murk
Please try to have less interesting sites on your incredibly
hilarious show.
My fiance and I were watching the Fetish show, and we had to
go look at
some of the sites you were showing. Well, after seeing they were
real, I
went back to see the rest of the show. My fiance didn't get away
from the
computer for 135 hours. I kept hearing her shocked gasps as each
increasingly bizarre site showed up. She fought like a cornered
wombat, claws
out, when I tried to pull her away from the computer after 49
hours.
Seriously, I have had better luck pulling greased cats out of
wells. Um,
maybe we shouldn't get into that.
Anyways, absolutely the best show on TV right now. Those Americans
have no
idea that all the best humor and TV comes from Canada, one way
or another.
Looking forward to your show being picked up for another series
of episodes,
and I have my VCR set to tape each show, but when you finally
release the
shows for sale, I will still buy them. Quality like this is hard
to find.
By the way, I was going to try smoking frogs, what kind are they?
Can I use
road kill, or does that leave a tar and asphalty taste afterwards?
Keep up the excellent work
Wayne
Murk replies,
You're supposed to smoke the oily essence
of Cane Toads from Australia, but
we were using formaldehyde-preserved Leopard Frogs from Saskatchewan.
As
for roadkill, sucking on just about anything found on a government
right-of-way that's been treated with herbicides will result
in a pretty
cool buzz.
From: Christina K.
To: wally@wallyandmurk.com
Subject: Hey
Date: Sat, 02 Sep 2000 00:35:56 EDT
Hello,
I just wanted to say that I absolutely love your show, and I
love how it's
not all censored! I'm 16, female and watch your show every week!
It's just hilarious! Keep it up, you guys are great!
Christina
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